I often hear from people who deeply regret cheating, but who are also at
a loss as to how to convince their spouse that they can be
rehabilitated and as a result turn out to be a loyal and loving spouse
once again. They often have already stressed how sorry they are. They've
often offered to go to counseling or to do whatever is necessary to
restore the trust. Still, their spouse understandably has doubts. As a
result, they are often left feeling as if they have to prove their love
and devotion to their spouse, but that is often like trying to hit a
rapidly moving target.
You might hear a comment like: "I deeply
regret cheating on my husband. I had an affair with one of the men who I
work with. I never thought that I would be the type of person to cheat
on my spouse. I never saw this coming and I never had any intentions of
ending my marriage. I want to rebuild my marriage and stay with my
husband. But he is making it very difficult. Every time I do or say
something loving or kind, he looks at me as if I am lying. If I try to
act like the loving wife that I believe myself to be, he will accuse me
of putting on a show just to get back into his good graces. The other
day, I told him that I feel as if I can't do anything right. I feel like
no matter what I do, he is still going to reject me or say that it's
too little too late. This hurts me deeply. He went so far as to say that
I have to 'prove my love.' I have no idea what this means. But I
suspect that it means that I have to do whatever he desires whenever he
desires it. I have to put my own needs and wants behind his own and go
out of my way to cater to his every whim. I realize that I put myself in
this position, but it still feels unfair. And I almost feel like I can
try my best to prove my love and he still won't be satisfied. And he
still won't really trust me regardless of what actions I take. What can I
do?"
This is a very common situation. Quite often, the faithful
spouse is going to have some doubts as well as a very distinct lack of
trust. You really can't blame this for this because they have been
betrayed. It is not as if they are suddenly demanding more because of no
fault of your own. Most cheating spouses fully realize this and they
are more than willing to try to make this right. The problem comes when
it appears that no matter what they do, it is never really going to
enough.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/7716234
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